I came across last night onto an acquaintance's blog. I like popping in so to speak. She often has entries that are meaningful and full of her own in sight which I like. One recent blog post in particular caught my attention. Her post about re-entering the Navy way of life. Now I enjoyed reading the post and reading the comments and her responses back but couldn't help but giggle to myself too. I remember how young Mark and I were when we got married and while it isn't for most couples to marry so young "these" days and quite honestly most marriages that occurred like ours don't last. Mark and I were the minority amongst our friends and are still standing strong. Now this wasn't a testament about whether marriages would or wouldn't last but how she perceived the way Navy Family life went. I thought I myself would post about how our "Navy Family life" really went.
I do remember being so innocent in the ways the Navy really worked. Of course it is a whole new ball game once you've actually married your sailor. You are no longer perceived as an individual, you are now ( & in my instance) AD1 Prescott's Wife. Well that is all fine and dandy, lets just add that to the jar where you are also Andrew's Mom, Caleb's Mom, & Elora's Mom or as I've been called by some teachers (in a loving way of course) The Prescott's Mom. Well now you are married to your Sailor, have had a couple children, your actions not only speak for yourself but truly for your husband. They reflect and they are reflected brightly in most cases. Now if you are not good with dealing with stress the Navy life isn't for you!
This is your one and only warning!!
The Navy like any other part of the military branches and job in the "real" world has their specific duties. Us Navy wives get to endure days, weeks, & months of work ups before the actual "D" day. Now when the deployments were actually 6 months we all thought that was bad enough, but really Big Navy has decided yes since we have cut so many good men & women lets have the ones who have made it through suffer even more so. Now deployments are 7 & 8 months, lots of them are doing 10 months which through the grape vine is being said to be the norm. Now these 10 months DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT include the previous months in work ups. There is always talk of cutting medical, cutting retirement plans, etc. Nothing ever seems stable all our hard work could seriously be for nothing by the time Mark gets to retire. Life is not easy by ANY MEANS.
For those who are not military & never understood and thought military families have it easy, you are dead wrong. We pay in personal sacrifices for what we have and believe me it is not much. Now some might think well you get to move for "free". I do laugh out loud at this thought. Yes when you move for "free" it often means they don't give a rats ass about your belongings & when something does break or go "missing" (aka stolen) they take make you fill out countless paper work, then proceed to tell you unless you have proof of it being in your house when they packed it (AKA you have a picture of it dated the day you packed out) it didn't exist or it takes 6+ months to get what they think your item is worth. Now some of us are truly lucky and either A) haven't had to move that often or B) truly got a decent company that didn't throw your stuff around like a rag doll. Plus moving military or not is stressful in itself.
Living in military housing. It has it's perks but they do come with a price. Rules. Now don't get me wrong rules are all fine and dandy but I'm sorry some rules are meant to be bent at least a smidgen! For instance housing has a two pet minimum rule and fish are included as ONE pet. Um hello, while yes I guess some people consider them a pet I don't think it should count lol. But hey that is just my opinion. Everyone is entitled to them. Now if you know me personally I love my fur babies and um SHHHHHHH I have 4. But you would never know it. Lots of housing areas don't want pets at all. Which makes searching for the appropriate housing a little difficult. Especially when you are new to the area and don't want to end up in the "ghetto".
Moving on...
Medical. Medical is a curse and a blessing all rolled into one. While you are usually at the mercy of a Navy hospital they have improved over the years. But you can be denied services if you are too far from your Navy medical center hospital. Yes, when my child is hurt and I want to run him or her to the clinic I need to call the "hot line" and speak to a nurse, the nurse will then call me back in about 20 min, hello 20 min are you kidding me? Why the hell would I wait 20 min if my child is hurt??? No sense at all. So we risk the chance of being billed ridiculous amounts of money cause we are 49.9 miles from the Navy hospital. Now with that being said I do have good stories too bout Navy medical. For instance when our sweet baby girl was getting ear infection after infection and strep back to back we were finally referred out and seen by a specialist and had her surgery, which was 100% covered by the Navy, or when they referred us out to make sure Andrew was not in the spectrum for autism. I've also never had to pay for a child birth (big bonus) either.
Okay I seeing this post be way too long this might be broken up into parts lol.
But back to my original meaning. When looking from the outside in sure it may be through rose colored glasses but honestly being a girlfriend and a wife (especially after you start your family) are truly in two different categories. There are many more responsibilities when you are the "wife", like POA's, wills, living wills, care plans, etc. I just wish it was truly all that innocent but when you've been in as long as we have things don't ever look the same.
This life isn't for everyone, if you are not into change I don't recommend it. I love all the wonderful people I've come across through out the years, hell some of my best friends are thanks to the Navy. Yes I would do it all over again, but that is because we've made into an experience, our love and marriage was strong to begin with and we make best of every situation given to us. With that being said much love, hugs, & smooches!
-Michelle
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